Him: Hey, uh, I need to sign up for a computer.
Him: Yeah, I, uh, missed my court date...
Him: And I guess the only way to get approved is if I have a signed letter from a doctor.
Me: Hmmm. Yeah that makes sense.
Him: So hey, can you help me write that?
Him: That letter. From the doctor. So, you know, I'll be off the hook. (big grin)
Me: Ummm, no I cannot forge a doctor's letter for you. That is illegal.
Him: Yeah...well, can you at least help me make it look official? Like with a logo and all that?
Me: ...!??!?!?!...I'm afraid you're on your own. Because that, too, is illegal.
Him: Awww...man...okay. Alright. I get it.
Me: (Do you???)
Weekend me, please.